On a whim last night, I found myself at Cafe du Nord. Walking down their entryway staircase into an intimate venue, every step further filled the air with the sound of piano keys hitting their notes, their cords. The warm glow of the faintly lit stage, the rusticness of the dark-wooded interior and the sense that the audience was filled with friends, family and warmhearted supporters paired nicely with the acoustics. I’d never heard of any of the artists, but it was better that way. Amber Rubarth, the evening’s headliner, was the only person behind us in line as we trickled in late,...

Talking about sex never gets old. So when faced with the opportunity to do so for two whole days at Sex::Tech, how could I resist? The weekend, while enlightening, also decidedly startled me. I realized what is completely missing from our conversations about sexual health: passion and pleasure. We are lucky enough to be among the few species that can actually enjoy sex because it feels good, and perhaps take for granted that we don’t have to fight for survival when making love with a partner. And yet, we continue to omit from the sex education conversation our innate, normal and healthy drive...

When we’re hungry, it’s simple — we eat. When we’re thirsty, we drink. But what about when you just want to and need to be touched? There are no touch cafes. Touch doesn’t come as a gift with purchase at the Lancôme counter. And if you’re not in a romantic relationship, how do you fill up your touch tank to full? There are often not enough outlets for affection in platonic relationships. Friends provide emotional support, memorable nights out, advice and adventures, but few friendships are so close that it’s comfortable and acceptable for you two to, say,...

I’ve always pondered the notion of “forever.” Of true love. Of what it takes to make a lifetime partnership work. When I think about marriage, about the thought of spending the rest of my life with one person, I continuously wonder: what does it take to devote yourself mentally, physically and emotionally to one soul … forever? My parents divorced when I was six, and I grew up with my mom’s boyfriends walking in and out of my life. I wasn’t raised in a functional version of “forever,” nor have I since encountered a seasoned marital relationship —...

“Oral sex” isn’t a bad word. It’s not a four-letter expletive; it’s not even a nickname for a sexual part of human anatomy. And yet, because it has to do with sex, it MUST BE BAD. That’s how some parents down in Menifee, California think, anyway. So passionately that a complaint about “oral sex” being in the Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionaries purchased for advanced readers at the local elementary school caused the books to be banned. Banned! It’s a dictionary. At an elementary school. How else are kids expected to develop a vocabulary?...

Well-equipped with Michael Pollan’s latest guide — small enough that yes, I did actually have it in my purse, it seemed only fitting that David and I were recently having a conversation about the price of meat versus the price of vegetables … in the car at 1 a.m. As a matter of experiment, we pulled off the freeway and into the drive-thru at In-N-Out. I was totally convinced that a grilled cheese was going to be less expensive than a normal hamburger, seeing as, well, THERE’S NO MEAT ON IT. Sadly, I was completely wrong. So what exactly are you paying extra for on the cheese...

I’m feeling the general consensus, from many friends and a few acquaintances, that 2009 was terrible. That they’re ready for it to be over. That whatever 2010 has in store, it’ll sure as hell be better than what 2009 had planned. And yet, in the process of wishing for time to pass quickly, ’tis the season of reflection and resolution: How we’re going to spend more time volunteering, cooking, spending quality time with family and friends, etc. … and less time focused on 140-character status updates and waiting in lines (because, really, you can buy just about...

Yoga has helped me figure out a lot of things. For one, that even people over six feet tall can touch their toes. (So yes, that means you can, too, with enough practice and encouragement.) One night, one lesson, one nugget of insight stands out in particular, though. Usually overflowing with bad jokes we can’t help but laugh at, my yogi was overflowing with wisdom, sharing with us his tidbits of knowledge as we struggled through Baddha Parivritta Parshvakonasana. His words became my mantra for the next hour — mostly just so I wouldn’t forget to write down what he said. He prefaced...

I remember falling in love with Frou Frou’s Let Go after seeing Garden State in 2004, and continued falling more and more in love with the track (and, frankly, with the entire album) after each play of the film’s soundtrack. (Honestly, who didn’t? That must be one of the best movie soundtracks of all time.) That one song marked the beginning of something. I don’t remember if I already had Frou Frou’s Details album (2002) — Imogen Heap’s and Guy Sigsworth’s short-lived duo project — buried in my then-unmanageable iTunes library (hellllloooo college),...

One of my favorite non-profits in San Francisco, About-Face, is on a mission to make a difference in how women see themselves. It’s no secret that pages of glossies, gossip mags, blogs and tabloids are overridden with airbrushed photos and images of women who were already too thin to begin with. And yet what are we doing about it? Nothing. Or, well, barely anything. (The April issue of French Elle is an astonishing exception.) Even the efforts to impose minimum weight requirements on (runway) models seems to be going nowhere, and we continue to see the same manipulated images — the most...